Because I Already Loved You

Written by Andrée-Anne Cyr

Illustrated by Bérengère Delaporte

Groundwood Books

978-1-77306-973-9

32 pp.

Ages 3-6

August 2023

Reviewed from uncorrected proofs

 

There is often so much anticipation for the birth of a new baby. There are the parents, of course, whose lives will be significantly altered in love and lifestyle, but also for other family members, including young children. But what happens when things do not go to plan and there is no baby to join the family?

From Because I Already Loved You, written by Andrée-Anne Cyr, illus. by Bérengère Delaporte

The young child in Because I Already Loved You knows that a baby is coming, and he is excited. He can touch his mother's belly and feel the baby move. And everyone is preparing for the baby's arrival, from his dad who is painting the room next to his, and his grandmother retrieving stored baby toys and his uncle teaching the child to do magic tricks for his new sibling. The child gets in on all the preparations, drawing his own pictures, and choosing a toy to give to the baby, and practising entertaining tricks.

From Because I Already Loved You, written by Andrée-Anne Cyr, illus. by Bérengère Delaporte

Then Mommy and Daddy announce that the baby is on the way. But when they return, the child doesn't understand why the baby isn't with them. When he is told the baby died, he doesn't understand that the baby will not be coming back. He watches as his family deals in the aftermath of the stillbirth and tries to find a way to remember and cope with his own sadness "because I already loved you!"

From Because I Already Loved You, written by Andrée-Anne Cyr, illus. by Bérengère Delaporte

There are many stories about children anticipating the birth of a new sibling and there are quite a few about death and grief, primarily related to grandparents and pets. But never have I read a story that addresses a family's heartache upon a stillbirth, particularly from the perspective of a young child. Quebec author Andrée-Anne Cyr gives us the full range of emotions for this family, first so filled with longing and hope for a new child, and then the overwhelming sorrow and disorientation when that joyous event turns to one of loss. The child gets caught up in all of it, from the excitement of preparations and expectancy for a sibling to love and teach and play with, to the sadness of missing someone they'd already fallen in love with and of witnessing the pain of his parents and other family members. And though there is healing with time, that absentee baby will never be forgotten because, as the little boy tells it, "I've saved you a place in my heart." While Andrée-Anne Cyr keeps the text simple, conveying ideas and feelings spoken from a young child's point of view, it is also profound in depth of feeling. There is an intensity and authenticity in the child's words and thoughts, from the pleasure of anticipating a sibling to the grief because of their loss, and I'm saddened for anyone who has experienced such a bereavement. 

 

French artist Bérengère Delaporte conveys that full range of emotion in her illustrations, whether it's the joy and wonder of children or the gravitas of weighty circumstances as grief. With sensitivity and  acumen, Bérengère Delaporte ensures that the family remains the same at their core but changes the atmosphere around them. Their sorrow is seen as a pall, a dark cloud that hangs over the family, something that can, with time, dissipate.

From Because I Already Loved You, written by Andrée-Anne Cyr, illus. by Bérengère Delaporte

I've learned that stillbirths are not as uncommon as I'd thought, occurring about once in every two hundred births, depending on location and other circumstances. As such, a lovely picture book like Because I Already Loved You will be a valuable bibliotherapeutic resource for helping young children comprehend never meeting a sibling whose arrival they'd been expecting. And they can be assured that the love for that baby will not disappear, just be held forever in memory and in heart.

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The original story is a French-language edition titled Je t'aimais déjà (Les 400 coups, 2021).

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