Tough Like Mum

Written by Lana Button

Illustrated by Carmen Mok

Tundra Books

978-0-7352-6598-1

32 pp.

Ages 3-7

April 2021

Though her mum might not always feel very tough or that she is able to manage, Kim tries to emulate her, never admitting she needs help or acknowledging anything she might perceive as weakness. But can anyone really be tough all the time?

From Tough Like Mum by Lana Button, illus. by Carmen Mok

From Carmen Mok's gouache and coloured pencil illustrations, it is evident that Kim and her mother are financially strapped. They share a bed, their socks are unmatched, their clothes and furniture are patched, and the food in the house is minimal. It's no wonder that Kim awakens soothing herself with her thumb in her mouth. But Kim is a tough cookie, tough like her mum, and she gets herself ready for school, making her own breakfast and lunch, and even planning for dinner–"Tomato, you are my favorite soup. Sit right here and wait for me"–because her mom hasn't gotten out of bed this morning. But Kim has a form for school that is due that day, a form for a field trip that costs $6.00. How is she going to get Mum to sign it when she's still sleeping, attempting to shut out the world–"Don't start on me, Kim!"–and get the money she knows they don't have?

On that cold winter day, Kim gets herself off to school, though some parents question her about being without a hat. Kim just tells them she doesn't need it, and the parents call her tough like her mom Jen. Kim won't let anyone see that she's cold. Because she's learned not to ask for help. And at lunchtime when David makes fun of her sandwich, she stays tough, never letting them see how sad and mad she is on the inside. But there's still the problem of the school trip. 

She has tried to find a solution, submitting a few coins she'd found in her mom's pocket, hoping the teacher wouldn't notice. But Mrs. Jones does notice and suggests her mother check a certain box on the form. It may read "I can't pay" but Kim knows it really means "I need help" and that's a box her mum has never checked.

From Tough Like Mum by Lana Button, illus. by Carmen Mok

Accepting help is never easy, and it seems to be especially so for Jen and Kim.  But when Kim gets home from school, she finds a way to take care of her mother, sadly still in the clothes she slept in, with compassion, humour and courage. Asking and accepting help might not be easy but it can be worth it.

From Tough Like Mum by Lana Button, illus. by Carmen Mok

Though Lana Button's picture books, including Raj's Rule (For the Bathroom at School), What If Bunny's NOT a Bully, and Willow Finds a Way, are aimed at young children, they focus on some tough issues. There are worries that young children have that cloud their lives and can cause anxiety. Whether it's bullying or self-confidence, using the bathroom or an absent teacher, Lana Button understands that these are very big issues for children. But in Tough Like Mum, Lana Button demonstrates that the shame of poverty transcends age and manifests differently for young children and for their parents who try to provide their best. Kim wants to be tough about what money they don't have, or the food she eats, or the clothes she wears. She strives to be tough like her mum. But sometimes being tough means accepting that help is needed. Together Kim and her mum realize this.

Lana Button's honest story of a single mum and child living in poverty and struggling with the perceived disgrace of their circumstances is stark. There are moments of lightness, like when Kim is praised for her reading and then brings that joy to her mum with it, or when they snuggle together in bed. But it's a hard life for both and the illustrations by Carmen Mok reflect that sparseness of their lives. From a sparsely-furnished home, to the mismatched clothing and furniture, patched or damaged, theirs is an unadorned life, and the art depicts that. 

From Tough Like Mum by Lana Button, illus. by Carmen Mok

But Lana Button's message of having the courage to accept help is paramount. Asking for help is not weak, though many, including Kim, may feel that it is so, exposing their vulnerabilities. Perhaps Kim's mum has never checked that box before, managing to somehow scrape together needed funds or accepting that Kim would have to do without. But by acknowledging that they might need some help, they've taken a big step forward. That just proves how tough Kim and her mum truly are.

 

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Check back tomorrow for my interview with author Lana Button about Tough Like Mum and her approach to writing this story.